An Ol' Broad's Ramblings
Archive for 31 July 2007
Totally UN PC Chuckle
Black Hurricanes
Well, it appears our African-American friends have found yet something else to be pissed about. A black congresswoman (Sheila Jackson Lee) reportedly complained that the names of hurricanes are all Caucasian sounding names. She would prefer some names that reflect African-American culture (such as: Chamiqua, Tanisha, Woeisha, Shaqueal, and Jamal).
She would also like the weather reports to be broadcast in language that street people can understand because one of the problems in New Orleans is that regular folks couldn’t understand the seriousness of the situation due to the racially biased language of the weather report.
I can hear it now: A weatherman in Houston reports:
“Wazzup, mutha-fukkas! Hehr-i-cane Chamiqua be headin’ fo’ yo ass like Leroy on a crotch rocket! Bitch be a category fo’! So grab yo’ chirren, yo’ Ho, be leavin yo crib, and head fo’ da nearest guv’ment office fo yo FREE shit!”
Courtesy of Mr. Ol’ Broad.
LOOOOOONG Day!
Is 10 hours in a car long enough? How do truck drivers do this every day? They’ve got my admiration, that’s for sure, but they don’t usually have a short person sitting right next to them, jabbering non-stop. The constant ‘what’, why’, ‘why not’ is enough to drive any extremely patient person up the wall, and I’m not all that patient. 
We did make one stop, in Tupelo, MS. Yep, birthplace of Elvis. Why not! It wasn’t far off the highway, and I had to exit there anyway, even if it was in the opposite direction.
Impressed yet?
How ’bout this….
Uh huh, tiny room. Maybe this will do it…
Actually, I thought that was a pretty cool stove, but I sure wouldn’t want to cook on it. Shoot, if it doesn’t go in the microwave, I’m not sure if I’d know how to cook. 
And here’s the outside….
No doubt about it, that’s a tiny house! And what was short person’s question? “Who is Elvis?” Oh well, at least she can say she’s been there. Maybe next trip I’ll take her to his REALLY tacky house…..Graceland. Honestly, I was more impressed with this one.
I Hate Those Damn Birds!
This morning I woke up to the sound of a whole herd of squirrels in combat boots, right over my head. I thought it might be the evil fowl, but when I came into the living room, there they ALL were, pretty as you please, crapping all over the front porch and eating my flowers. So, we did the Peacock Dance for a while. Front, back, front, back. One of those birds is even more stupid than the rest of them. I had the ‘water cannon’ on it for a good 45 seconds until it realized that being drenched wasn’t pleasant. Stupid bird!
I have better things to do in the morning than to fight with critters, like keeping other critters from fighting. The cats are making great headway. Mr. Spot wasn’t too pleased that Hootie was drinking out of HIS toilet. At least she finally got off the cabinet, and sadly spent the entire night stuck in my closet. I saw Mr. Spot pawing at the door, and thought he just wanted to get in there. Nope! Out comes Hootie, aggravated to high heaven. Tazz and Mr. Spot have been nose to nose a couple of times, with no major damage done. Things are looking up?
I feel really guilty about leaving them again, especially since Miss Cindy (critter sitter) hasn’t met the two new arrivals yet. But small child MUST go back to Texas, and I must be the one to take her. We’re setting out in about an hour, after I wake her up, for the Houston area, to pick up her sister, Brat Jr. (birthday on Thursday…a whopping 15), and then on to Dallas. Two days, max, then I’m right back here, dealing with window shades and movers, cats and peacocks. Yeah me. Ya know, I haven’t seen the goats. Hmmmm…..
I’m thinking perhaps there should be some target shooting in my future as well. Â 
