An Ol' Broad's Ramblings
Archive for Just Cuz
My ‘Dead’ Music
So, you’re asking…what is ‘dead’ music? And even if ya aren’t, I’m gonna tell ya anyway! My ‘dead’ music is a piece of music I want played at my funeral. Well, that is, if we can still AFFORD a funeral. If not, a big ol’ black trash bag will work just as well. What do I care? I won’t be in it. Just a shell, right? 
Ok, back to the ‘dead’ music. I first heard this piece of music in 1983, or 84, can’t remember exactly. At the time I was driving home at sunset, and it was just perfect. Listening to it, it actually sounds like a sunset! Well, at least to me it does. And what is physical death? Well, the sun is setting on your earthly life. See? ‘Dead’ music.
I Lived!
Yep…I had the heart cath this morning. Yep…there were blockages. Nope…didn’t get any stents. 
Doc said they aren’t big enough. Wonder what they call ‘big enough’? Is there were the entire vessel is blocked, and you’ve already succumbed? *shakes head* Well, that’s the good news, at any rate.
The bad news? I was awake through the whole procedure and lemme tell ya….IT HURTS! I was supposed to be knocked plum out! I was the last time they did one. This time? Pfft! Oh, they said they gave me plenty of meds so I wouldn’t feel anything. They lied! I felt EVERYTHING! Ever had a serrated knife shoved in your groin area? I doubt if that would have hurt near as much. You’d think she could have sent me home with a few pain killers while this hole is healing, right? Oh HELL no. Not only did they not believe me when I informed ‘em that I was feeling every single dig into my bod, they evidently don’t think I need anything after for the constant pain.
So now, I’m suppose to ‘take it easy’ for a couple of days, not life anything heavier than 10 pounds (she obviously didn’t weigh my purse before we left), and rest. Well, I can do that! Heh. In the meantime, I’m going to be sprawled out on the bed, watching movies, or reading, or generally being catatonic with the other cats. So, if ya don’t hear from me until tomorrow night, or even Thursday, you’ll know why!
And yes, I did hear that Rick Santorum dropped out of the race. I find it rather odd that he got more people votes than Romney, yet is WAY behind in the delegate department. Somehow, that just doesn’t make sense. I’ll have more to say on the subject in the future, but for right now….I’m going to play potato! 
Blind Bunny
One morning a blind bunny was hopping down the bunny trail and tripped over a large snake and fell, kerplop right on his twitchy little nose.
‘Oh please excuse me,’ said the bunny. ‘I didn’t mean to trip over you, but I’m blind and can’t see.’
‘That’s perfectly all right,’ replied the snake. ‘To be sure, it was my fault. I didn’t mean to trip you, but I’m blind too, and I didn’t see you coming. By the way, what kind of animal are you?’
‘Well, I really don’t know,’ said the bunny.. ‘I’m blind, and I’ve never seen myself. Maybe you could examine me and find out.’
So the snake felt the bunny all over, and he said, ‘Well, you’re soft, and cuddly, and you have long silky ears, and a little fluffy tail and a dear twitchy little nose. You must be a bunny rabbit!’
The bunny said, ‘I can’t thank you enough. But by the way, what kind of animal are you?’
The snake replied that he didn’t know either, and the bunny agreed to examine him, and when the bunny was finished, the snake asked, ‘Well, what kind of an animal am I?’
The bunny had felt the snake all over, and he replied, ‘You’re cold, you’re slippery, and you have no balls…You must be a POLITICIAN’
Swiped from Jim via FB.
Suzie Homemaker? *snicker* Riiiiiiiiiiiight!
So, I had this bright idea the last couple of days…..I’m gonna do a bit of gardening, put some flowers in post,and brighten up the outside a bit. Yup…REAL bright idea! I’ve got at least two more pots to fill, and not sure if that’s even gonna happen!
I cleaned up the white wrought iron table and chairs that haven’t been cleaned since they landed on the porch 5 years ago. Oh yeah…they were pretty nasty. Had to use a bloomin’ scrub brush! I was none too thrilled when I looked down, and saw a fat, hairy, black spider crawling across my foot either!
I really….REALLY…don’t like spiders! Almost as much as I totally dislike snakes and scorpions!
That scrub brush did a real good job on him though. And I didn’t even puncture my foot!
Then, I continued with my ‘project’. Yep, I can make a pretty big mess when the opportunity occurs.
I learned a couple of very important lessons during this process:
1- There are things called ‘gardening muscles’ and I think I’ve found every single one of them. Ache is an understatement! Even my hair hurts, and I don’t have enough of it to spare to aches! I’m moving a wee bit better today, but not by much! How did I manage to do all the athletic stuff I did in my younger years? Sheesh! Ok, so I’m no spring chicken, but still……
2- Apparently, I’m quite allergic to Red Rock Lava. Seriously? A person can be allergic to lava? I had to look it up! Seems there is some sort of mold that can grow in it, and it looks like I’m allergic to that! I guess. BIG sneezes, which the Mr says he’s never heard me have. I couldn’t breathe, I sounded like a frog, and the nose was running a marathon!
Now, since I spend the majority of the night getting about 5 hours of totally interrupted sleep….moving during sleep can cause many groans….I’m going to go take a nap! Perhaps, if I’m able to move and function after I wake up, I think I’ll tackle the big flower bed. What a mess! Ok…we have a REAL good excuse. Between the two of us, the last couple of years have been, well, less than healthy ones. Hmmm… Then again, I might just close my eyes each time I walk by it! That way, the mess doesn’t exist, right?
Well, Ain’t That A Kick In The………….
Here I am, getting ready to head down to Corinth so we don’t have to get up any earlier than necessary to get to the hospital, and what happens? They rescheduled. sigh… Ok, so next Tuesday, they’ll be shoving wires in me, and seeing what’s what. Evidently, there were some serious emergencies, and I guess things aren’t as bad with me as she made it sound? I dunno, but if I croak between now and then, I expect a few folks to raise a ruckus, and you KNOW who you are!
But ya know…I was really looking forward to going to the Chinese buffet for some serious chowing down. sigh…
One major plus….I do get to go to church tonight, and will be able to continue my experiment in gardening for the next couple of days. Although, come to think of it, I HAVE been a mite slow and sore today. Heh.
More Fun Stuff
sigh… Just when I thought the bad times were over….there just HAD to be one more issue to pile on. Apparently, when I went to see my heart doc yesterday, she saw something she didn’t like. Hmmm… Might have something to do with that excruciating pain I have been having over the last couple of months? Who knows, but she has decided she is going to do another heart cath. Had one before she wired me up for my internal mp3 player…..aka pace maker. It wasn’t too bad cuz, well, I was knocked out and didn’t much care. Heh.
In case ya don’t know what a heart cath is, she knocks me out, and shoves a wire up through the big vein in my right thigh, and that wire gets pushed up into my heart. Doesn’t that sound like fun? Oh, yippee! 
So, anyway, this is suppose to take place at dawn’s crack on Thursday. What she told me is that it is possible there is a blockage, which has caused the pain. Ok. If that is the case, while they have me knocked out, they’ll be shoving a balloon up there too, and put in a stent. Now, my brother and my brother in law have both had stents, and both of ‘em are doing pretty good now, so I’m not concerned. Well, not much. Hmmm… Come to think of it, after my brother had the stents, he ended up having a heart attack. Crap! Why did I think of that? SHEESH! But he’s ok now, proud grandpa and all that!
I spent nearly 4 hours at the doc’s office yesterday, 2 different tests, with 2 hours of waiting, and another 2 hours, 45 minute wait, there today. UGH! According to what the tech said, my legs look good today. At least on the inside. On the outside? Well, we won’t go there.
I did learn something interesting yesterday when she was doing the sonogram type thingy on my heart. Evidently, they get the best pictures of the heart on diabetics and black men. She had no idea why that is so, but I thought it was interesting.
So, now y’all are up to date. I’ve had real life invade, and it’s definitely interfered with my computer life.
Natural Born Citizens
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry…
You, who worry about Democrats versus Republicans — relax, here is our real problem.
In a Purdue University classroom, they were discussing the qualifications to be President of the United States. It was pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age.
However, one girl in the class immediately started in on how unfair was the requirement to be a natural born citizen. In short, her opinion was that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president.
The class was taking it in and letting her rant, and not many jaws hit the floor when she wrapped up her argument by stating, “What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by C-section?”
Yep, these are the same kinds of 18-year-olds that are now voting in our elections! They breed, and they walk among US…
Lord — we need more help than we thought we did!
The Mr sent me this yesterday, and in Ol’ Broad fashion, I got behind on my emails, and just now got a gander. All I can do is shake my head. God help us all!
Trip To Wally World
Yep…I’m off to the ever popular Wal-Mart….again! I was just there on Monday, but I’ll be darned if I didn’t forget a couple of things, even WITH a list. sigh… For you viewing entertainment, I give a few examples of what I see when I go.
Oh, but don’t forget, it’s usually a family affair, and there are mullets involved. 
In case ya can’t read it, and likely ya can’t, since it’s small and backwards….
I’M A GOD FEARIN’
BIBLE BELIEVIN’
GUN PACKIN’
AMERICAN LOVIN’
CONSERVATIVE
And I’ve got my NRA camo flip flops on, too! Got a problem with that? Most comfy pair of flips I’ve ever had! Got ‘em at the convention a couple of years ago, and they have taken me through many trips to Wally World!
Yeah…I really AM old and fluffy. So what? Which is probably why I have to go get my blood sucked first. sigh…
Never EVER Judge A Book By Its Cover!!
H/T: Chris via FB
Hey, Wasn’t This Us?
A little house with three bedrooms,
one bathroom and one car on the street.
A mower that you had to push
to make the grass look neat.
In the kitchen on the wall
we only had one phone,
And no need for recording things,
someone was always home.
We only had a living room
where we would congregate,
unless it was at mealtime
in the kitchen where we ate.
We had no need for family rooms
or extra rooms to dine.
When meeting as a family
those two rooms would work out fine.
Read on…
“People of Wal-Mart”….. Cuz I Can
After my recent experience at what I can only call the worst Wal-Mart experience while in Texas (Cleveland), the Mr evidently thought sending me a video of the ‘people of Wal-Mart’ would be amusing. Uh huh. Well, I found the other one while watching the first. There are apparently quite a few such videos available. Two are plenty for now. Yes, I saw some interesting sights while in that one, and most all Wal-Marts, come to think of it.
The Senior Version
92 YEAR OLD PREACHER
While watching a little TV on Sunday instead of going to church, I watched a church in Atlanta honoring one of its senior pastors who had been retired many years. He was 92 at that time and I wondered why the church even bothered to ask the old gentleman to preach at that age. After a warm welcome, introduction of this speaker, and as the applause quieted down, he rose from his high back chair and walked slowly, with great effort and a sliding gait to the podium. Without a note or written paper of any kind he placed both hands on the pulpit to steady himself and then quietly and slowly he began to speak….
“When I was asked to come here today and talk to you, your pastor asked me to tell you what was the greatest lesson ever learned in my 50-odd years of preaching. I thought about it for a few days and boiled it down to just one thing that made the most difference in my life and sustained me through all my trials.. The one thing that I could always rely on when tears and heartbreak and pain and fear and sorrow paralyzed me… the only thing that would comfort was this verse……..
“Jesus loves me this I know.
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to Him belong,
we are weak but He is strong…..
Yes, Jesus loves me…
The Bible tells me so.”
The old pastor stated, “I always noticed that it was the adults who chose the children’s hymn ‘Jesus Loves Me’ (for the children of course) during a hymn sing, and it was the adults who sang the loudest because I could see they knew it the best.”
“Here for you now is a Senior version of Jesus Loves Me”:
JESUS LOVES ME
Jesus loves me, this I know,
Though my hair is white as snow
Though my sight is growing dim,
Still He bids me trust in Him.
(CHORUS)
YES, JESUS LOVES ME.. YES, JESUS LOVES ME..
YES, JESUS LOVES ME, FOR THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO.
Though my steps are oh, so slow,
With my hand in His I’ll go
On through life, let come what may,
He’ll be there to lead the way.
(CHORUS)
When the nights are dark and long,
In my heart He puts a song..
Telling me in words so clear,
“Have no fear, for I am near.”
(CHORUS)
When my work on earth is done,
And life’s victories have been won.
He will take me home above,
Then I’ll understand His love.
(CHORUS)
I love Jesus, does He know?
Have I ever told Him so?
Jesus loves to hear me say,
That I love Him every day.
(CHORUS)
Shared by Jerry.
Headed Home
This morning, I loaded up my truck with all the stuff I had brought, and bought, and started my trek back home. FINALLY!
I love my family…I really do! But after nearly 4 weeks, don’cha think it’s time for this old woman to let them have their privacy back? Well, as much privacy as they can get with the 13, 19, 26 year old invaders, and a wee baby boy. *snicker* I miss my bed! I miss the Mr! I miss my cats! And I especially miss MY bathroom! MINE! ALL MINE!
So, the day started out ok…until I stopped for gas. I wanted to fill up before I got on the road. This is the same place I filled up last week at $3.65. That’s bad enough. It definitely put a major lump in the credit card balance. Ok, granted, I as just about empty, but $72? That’s absurd! Today….$3.89! THREE DOLLARS AND EIGHT NINE CENTS! That’s 24 cents MORE than last week. And I heard on the radio that Obama doesn’t believe this is a problem? Can I smack some sense into him? Un-freakin’-believable!
Of course, I had my usual issue getting on the freeway in Beaumont. Those people are still nuts.
‘Nuff said. All was going well until I got to that little town on the west side of Baton Rouge. Now, if I had managed to leave perhaps an hour earlier, it might not have been so bad. However, we all know I’m not a morning person, and I had to sit and talk with Jr for a bit, and smooch on Spud, naturally. Jr didn’t want me to leave. Seriously? Me gone means I won’t complain about her leaving stuff on the bathroom floor. You’d think that would make her happy. Nope. I’m thinking she’s having a bit of that postpartum problem. Kind of that empty feeling after the baby is born apparently. I’m sure she’ll be ok, and besides, we’ll be down again in July, to hopefully blow stuff up, and get that four generations picture taken.
I got on the bridge to go over the Mississippi River, and it was mostly stop, and very little go. That thing was bouncing. A LOT! I don’t like bouncing bridges. Bridges aren’t suppose to bounce. They make me very uncomfortable. Even after we all got off that thing, it was mostly stop, and no go. Fer cryin’ out loud! It took about an hour and a half to go about 12 miles. UGH! I had planned to get a little closer to Jackson, MS, but after that…no way Jose’! This ol’ broad was cramping up, stressed out, and SO ready to get away from the crazy people. Ok, so I’ve got a bit farther to drive tomorrow to get home, but that’s ok…I don’t care! I have stopped.
I have taken much needed muscle relaxers, and am now watching American Idol. By choice, if you can believe that! Blame Brat and Ick! It’s THEIR FAULT! I watched the recorded stuff with them, and now I have to find out who wins. I like Skylar m’self. She’s got spunk. I like Colton and Philip too. Yep….I’ve lost it, and it’s THEIR fault!
Got A Question….
So, the left is all up in arms about insurance companies, and religious organizations paying for ‘women’s health care’, right? Of course, it really isn’t about ‘women’s health care’, it all about contraception, abortions, and morning after pills. What that has to do with health care is beyond me. Seems to me if women were concerned, they do a bit less…..umm…. bed time. But that’s my opinion, so we’ll leave it at that!
So, my question is this….what about ‘men’s health care’? Will insurance companies and employers be forced to buy condoms for men? Will they pay for vasectomies? Or vasectomy reversal? Isn’t that ‘health care’ dealing with reproductive issues? Why are males left out of the argument? Don’t they count?
Just sayin’.
Help?
Brat has had this cat…well, she’s suppose to be Short Person’s, but that’s not important….since she was about 2 months old, and as the cat has been getting older, she’s been losing fur on her stomach. Well, now that it’s pretty much bald, guess what she had hidden under it! A bloomin’ tattoo!
Obviously, said feline wasn’t all that happy at being held in such a position, but oh well. Heh. The issue is…what in the world is that, and why would anyone tattoo a kitten’s stomach area? Can anyone tell what that is, and has anyone ever heard of tattooing a kitten? I’d guess that someone might do it as an identifying mark if the cat ever got lose, and lost, but since they’ve had the cat since she was itty bitty….just doesn’t make any sense.
