An Ol' Broad's Ramblings
Archive for The Peacock War
Blog “Fast”
It might be surprising to a few folks that I actually turned off my computer yesterday morning, and did not turn it back on till just about 10 minutes ago. I “fasted”…..no computer. Well, I didn’t haven’t major withdrawals, and I did survive. Odd. 
I spent the last 24 hours dealing with some of life’s realities. I am carless. Well, on a temporary basis. Turns out I wasn’t crazy. My little PT really DID have something wrong. And they couldn’t figure this out that last few times I took it in? Sheesh. Well, that something wrong is going to cost about $800 to fix. There may also be other things they have to fix too, but won’t for sure until they get the first problem resolved. The total may end up costing somewhere between $1500 and $2000. 
The Mr didn’t seem to think it was a good time to buy me that truck, although, the thought has been planted. Heh.
So, I am back. But y’know, I might do a computer “fast” more often. I wouldn’t come over to the kitchen to see Mr Peacock ensconced on the deck.
And if I don’t see him, he isn’t really there, right? 
Peek a Boo…..
……. I SEE you!
Yeah, I see you too! It would be even better if I’d see YOU on a platter! With perhaps a sprig or two of parsley!
The Mr and I discussed, again, putting Mr Peacock out of my misery, but decided it’s too flippin’ hot to dig a hole. I’ve no doubt the evil fowl will make future appearance, so the opportunity is not lost to relieve feckless neighbor of his very LAST invader!
Will He Never Die?
You’d expect if someone was eliminating your friends, you’d get the idea that you weren’t wanted in the neighborhood, right? Well, not this stupid bird. We saw him out front in the yard, and the Mr, who has many things to do this morning before it gets REALLY hot (it’s only 89 right now at 10:30), decided to just run him off. Well, he did leave for a bit. Then I notice movement, and tada! There he is, making himself all cozy on the deck, hanging out in the shade of the house.
Well, I suppose I could go out there and shoot him myself, but….y’know, since he’s the last one….what would I have to complain about? Seriously, think about it. If I didn’t have that stupid bird, annoying the hell outta me, everything around here would be just peachy. So, I’m wondering, since it’s just him, and he doesn’t seem to want to get into my potted plants, or garden bed, should we really put him out of my misery? Ok, granted, he does crap on the deck, but we need to have some work done on it anyway. Actually, I’d LOVE to turn the upper part into a sun room. Heh. We’re still discussing that possibility. Even screening it in is an option…you know, with a ceiling fan going and all that.
Anyways, Mr Peacock has a reprieve…..for the moment. I might not be in such a generous mood tomorrow!
Morning Visitor….In The Afternoon?
Yes, my overly amorous evil fowl dropped by for a visit. He usually shows up in the morning, while I’m trying to get both eyes open with a large pot of coffee, dressed in jammies, and in NO mood to deal with the feathered invader.
I noticed a shadow outside the kitchen window. I had the shade pulled down to cut the heat from the sun coming through the glass. Yes, boys and girls, that ol’ sun produced……KITCHEN WARMING!
I thought it was probably a leaf blowing, until I saw those “feet”. sigh… Mr Spot evidently had to check out the action as well.
By the time I got my shoes on to discuss the matter with Mr Peacock, he was heading back towards home. Oh well, at least I got a few weeds pulled while keeping an eye out for his return.
And A Good Morning To You Too!
There’s nothing like coming in to sit quietly at the computer, drink your coffee, look up and see……
Yep, Mr Peacock is back! Playing peeking Tom! sigh….
Oddly enough, he’s all by his lonesome. Wonder what happened to the rest of his pals? 
Reckon someone else took out his last girlfriend, cuz she sure isn’t here….behind the shed……a few feet under. 
I’ve been up since about 6:30 and he’s been my constant companion. Lucky me. sigh… Then he starts shaking his hind end at me, dancing all around. Tacky bird. You’re not my type!
The Mr and I have discussed this, and at this point in time, since he’s not doing any damage, well, other than crapping on the deck, we’re going to leave him be. I think there’s something wrong with his left foot too. He seems to be favoring that one a bit.
So, we started out with seven of the evil fowl, and are now down to only one invading our space. Honestly, if we weren’t heading out on a road trip after church this afternoon, he just MIGHT join his brethren in the great Peacock “beyond”. Heh.
I Was Too Slow
The Mr, Jr and I heard a seriously LOUD bird call this morning. I was sitting here, where I normally do in the morning, drinking my coffee, minding my own business. Jr and the Mr were in the office, doing what they do. It was a “Holy crap! What the hell was that?” moment.
We all go flying out the front door, looking around. Then I happened to look up. What do I see? Well, that stupid male with long feathers! I wasn’t fast enough to get a shot (camera) of him, and we decided it wouldn’t be a good idea to shoot him up there. If the Mr misses, we have holes in our roof, OR, someone on the road behind us gets hurt. NEITHER of which is a good idea!
Wouldn’t you think that if your mate was worm food, you’d try to avoid the place that made her such? Not this stupid bird!
Wonder what happened to his other girlfriend? Hmmmm……
ACK!
Ever since this morning’s “incident“, this dadburn song has been running through my head!
MAKE IT STOP!!
I HATE THOSE *^$% BIRDS!
This is not how I wanted to start my morning. Cats are fed, the coffee is made, and I’m perusing the news. I look up to find my deck has become a ‘love nest’ for freakin’ peacocks! NOT my idea of major entertainment, lemme tell ya!
No, I didn’t catch ‘em in the “act”. This is a family friendly site after all!
So, after numerous, “Get the hell out of of here you *&#^)@#* birds!” and dragging Mr Spot back in the door, it was peaceful……for a while.
I hear the Mr coming into the living room. “That peacock just signed her own death warrant!”
Let’s face it, we have been through hell with those evil fowl! It’s not just the monetary loss, it’s also the mess we are constantly have to clean up, thanks to their crapping all over the place.
This is just one of the MINOR problems we’ve had:
Trust me! You do NOT want to piss off the MR first thing in the morning!
I HATE Those Freakin’ Birds!
“Ya know, it’s really hard work getting chased all morning. Time for a siesta!”
This is NOT How I Wanted to Start My Day!
I hate those freakin’ birds!!!! But ya wanna know what’s so great??? Heh. Out of seven, there are only two of the poop producers left!
Sadly, though, that means I/we still have to deal with those two.
Y’know, I’m just not up to chasing the evil fowl, or even shooting them off the deck this morning. Maybe it’ll rain soon……..and lightening will strike ‘em?
*snicker*
Word has it that one of my evil fowl foes has bit the big one, and we had nothing to do with it! (See the ongoing saga of the Peacock War.)
Evidently, said feathered “friend” became a car bomb. Now, before Homeland Security gets its knickers in a twist, it wasn’t a LITERAL bomb. My favorite neighbor, as per his norm, doesn’t seem to mind that his animals get lose and are in danger. This particular critter exploded. The car is just fine.
Sorry.
No…really. Shame on me.
Ack!
Ya know, there are some things I could have gone the rest of my life without seeing.
We have been invaded by the evil fowl again, and while I was mumbling under my breath about how much I hate those damn birds, I happened to glance up and see……..Peacock love!
This is not what I would have wished for a Sunday morning. Well, any morning actually. Wasn’t it bad enough I found a dead female cardinal on the front porch. No evidence of what killed her, but dead all the same. NO, I have to be graced with those stupid birds in a randy frame of mind.
The Mr, “How was it?”
Me, “Fast, thank goodness!”
Actually, it was so fast, I couldn’t even grab the camera that was sitting right next to me before it was all over.
Oh, PLEASE Lord, do NOT expose me to such visions again!
I HATE Those Freakin’ Birds!
After several months of relative peace, and no sign of the evil fowl, this morning, they made their appearance!
Yes, they are back. Only four of them though. Gee, I wonder what happened to the other two? Heh heh heh
Mental image: Short, fat ol’ woman running after evil birds in jammies. Blech!
I managed to get them into the woods, and they looked like they were headed home. Nope! No such luck! Then along comes our neighbor’s dog, Ugly. I love that dog! 
 He got one treed, and the others took off in short order. I reckon he remembers how tasty their brothers were last Dec.
Too Stupid to Live!
Yep, it doesn’t seem to matter what we do, those damn birds are bound and determined to make my life a living hell!
We’re trying finish getting packed, and the car loaded up so we can head out, and these evil fowl must make an appearance. It seems there is one of the females is missing. No, not the two the Mr dispatched, another one. There were only four twanging my last nerve this morning. I wonder if someone else has gotten sick of their consistent destruction, or Mr Red Truck let them get out in the road. Not the first time he’s done something like that. Anyone who intentionally leaves his gate open and allow HORSES to roam around on the highway, has serious issues. We did the deceased duo a favor!
Sssshhhhhhh!
Don’t tell anyone! Just in case you were wondering what happened to previously mentioned deceased foul fowl, the last time we saw, the evidence was being munched by the neighboring canines.
Heh.
